Friendship Part IV: No Greater Love

I ended with this verse in part three, and now I’m going to begin part four with it. John 15:13 says, “Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friends.” This is literal and figurative. Laying down your life for someone doesn’t exactly mean that you die for them (although in some rare cases, this can happen). What it does mean is that you lay down what you want for someone else (hint: your friend(s)). It means not fighting for your way, but giving up what you want or even your comfort for a friend (or anybody for that matter). The literal sense of this verse is about what Jesus did for us.

            The music group Phillips, Craig, and Dean did a song a few years ago called “Friend of God”, which is an accurate assessment of our situation. If we were not friends of God, why would he give his life for us? John 15 continues on to say, “You are My friends if you do whatever I command you.” God has a far greater love than we could ever hope to receive from people on earth, who are fallen. God loved us so that we could learn how to love one another. His love is (or should be) the model that we go off of when trying to love someone (especially if that someone is difficult to love).

            If you think that you are doing well at loving people, or if you are having trouble loving people, or even if you are somewhere in between, open your Bible to 1 Corinthians 13, that’s right, it’s the “love chapter”. I figured that if we’re talking about friendship and love, what better place to look? Just look at the list of things that we need to have in order to perfectly love people: Patience, Kindness, Contentedness, Humility, Purity, and love lasts forever. Hmmm, this list sounds like another one that is listed in scripture (hint: love, joy, peace, etc.). Look at Galatians 5:22-23, which says, “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, and self-control..."

            So I think if we combine both of these lists, they create an image of the best friend… Jesus. Jesus is the only one who can meet all of the requirements to being a perfect friend. We will not be able to do it until we have glorified minds and bodies in heaven. This also means that we always have a goal to strive for in our relationships, which is perfection. Although, in our current state, perfection is impossible, we don’t have to let it discourage us. Instead, we should let it fill us with a renewed sense of vigor to keep striving to be the perfect friend, spouse, parent, or child.

            Colossians 3 describes love as the “perfect bind”, and it is also the strongest bind; a bind that holds relationships together. There is no greater love that you can offer than to lay down your life for your friends. There is only one who can love us perfectly, and that is God. His love toward us is meant to be the example that we follow when we love (or try to love) others. Also, we cannot learn to truly love anyone unless we love God. Through four of the five parts, we have almost completed the full outline of what it means to be a good friend, and how we can learn more about being a good friend, which is by mimicking God’s love toward us. 

Friendship Part III: Outlining a Friend

Do you know how many times the word “love” is used in the Bible? It is used 573 times in the New King James translation. How about the word “friend”? 131 times! I think that friendship and love is very important if it is mentioned that many times. I want to just take a minute and look at the dictionary’s definition of a few terms. Here are just a few definitions for love: somebody much loved, worship of God, very strong affection, passionate attraction and desire that is mostly romantic. So there are a couple ways to look at love. First, there is a romantic and sexual attraction to someone, which is not the love that is most often mentioned in the Bible. Second, God’s love for his creation, which is the type of love most mentioned in the Bible. The third kind of love is deep compassion or a strong friendship, which is the type of love I want to talk about the most.

            Before we can talk about that kind of love, we must define one word there, and that is friendship, or friend. Friend means someone who you trust and are emotionally close to. Friendship is a relationship between friends (simple enough). So now that we have the “official” definitions; throw those out the window and grab your Bible. We are going to make our own definitions of love and what a friend is. Before we start on that, you need to understand the different levels of relationships. There is your relationship with God, your relationship with your spouse (unless you are younger), your relationship with your family, your relationship with friends, and your relationship with people you don’t know.

            Your relationship with God is so much different than a relationship with friends. You and God are not equal, you appeal up to Him, and he is in control of you and everything around you. Your relationship with your spouse (if you have one) should be next in importance, and although you are both equal, you should be trying to please your spouse and be trying to love them. Next would be your relationship with your family. Following that would be your relationship with friends, and lastly, your relationship with people around you that you may or may not know.

            In this article, I intend to focus on the relationship between friends. Proverbs 27:17 says, “As iron sharpens iron, so a man sharpens the countenance of his friend.” So as Christians, our relationships need to be sharpening us, or in other words, our relationships need to be strengthening us in our Christian walk. A friend can help you in many ways, and just to show you a handful of them, look at these passages: Ephesians 4:15, Proverbs 17:17, and Ecclesiastes 4:9-12. So what is a friend good for? Why have friends? Well, the verse in Ephesians says that a friend speaks the truth in love. Proverbs 17:17 says, “A friend loves at all times…” Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 has little snippets of advice about friends, “Two are better than one…” and “If one falls, the other is there to pick him up…” and also “One may be overpowered, but two may withstand…”

           

               Something very important for you to understand is that these things are not only what a friend is good for, but also what you should be as a friend. As we draw to the conclusion of this article, I think it very important that you don’t just choose friends wisely, but that you are also a good friend. I just want to conclude this article with two verses from John 15:13-14, which says, “Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friends. You are My friends if you do whatever I command you.” So, are you being a good friend, and if so, have you surrounded yourself with good influences?

Friendship Part II: BFFs In Troubled Times

Sometimes I get carried away when I don’t focus on tiny sections of scripture, so I will limit myself to one chapter, which tells about potentially two of the best friends ever. I don’t want you to take my word for it, though, so open your Bible to 1 Samuel 20. Who is it about? That’s right; it is about David and Jonathan. If you want the full back-story on these two, read 1 Samuel chapters one through nineteen. The basic story behind David is that at this point in time, he is way more popular than Saul, the king at the time (See 1 Samuel 18:7). Another thing that irritates Saul is that David has been anointed as king by the prophet Samuel (see 1 Samuel 16). Basically, Saul hates David, and on a number of occasions has tried to kill David.  

            David is more or less the palace musician, playing the harp for Saul and other members of the court, and while on this job runs into Saul’s son, Jonathan. Jonathan must have been an easy guy to get along with, because they become best friends rather quickly. Now, to get to the passage, 1 Samuel chapter twenty picks up with David fleeing the city of Naioth, and he somehow goes and meets with Jonathan. David is saying, “What have I done that has made your Dad this mad? He will surely kill me!” Jonathan’s immediate reply goes along the lines of this, “No! You will not die! Dad doesn’t do anything without letting me know!” David then explains that Saul has picked up on the fact that they’re BFFs, and he won’t tell Jonathan anything based on that fact. So they talk a little bit more and then devise this plan to find out Saul’s intentions.

            The following day was to be the great celebration, the celebration of the New Moon, which was a mandatory three-day feast in Israel (commanded in Numbers 10:10). So the first part of the friends’ clever scheme was to have David be absent from the palace New Moon celebration/feast. Of course, Saul would recognize that they were missing someone, and when he would ask about it, Jonathan would say that he had given David permission to go to another city (Bethlehem) for the feast, for David had relatives in Bethlehem. Jonathan would then judge his father Saul’s intentions by his reaction; if Saul treated it like no big deal, then David was safe, but if Saul became angry, it could be assumed that David’s life was in trouble. So this was serious, Jonathan going against Saul, who was not only his father, but was also the king of Israel.

            So the second part of their plan was that Jonathan would come out after the three-day feast and shoot three arrows out into this field where David would be hiding. If he sent a servant, who would retrieve the arrows, to one side of this large boulder which was in the field, it was safe, but if he sent the servant to the other side, it meant for David to get out of the city as fast as he could. Jonathan and David part at this point and David hides in the field during the feast. The first night of the feast, all goes well, and Saul is not angry with David’s absence. Then the second night, Saul is really angry, saying, “Why hasn’t David showed up today or yesterday!” Jonathan explains once again that David is in Bethlehem and that makes Saul go nuts. Saul grabs a nearby spear and chucks it at Jonathan, intending to kill him, causing Jonathan to storm off in anger (and probably some part of it was from fear).

            Morning came; making it the third day of the feast, and Jonathan took the arrows and shot them to the side that meant danger. After his servant retrieved them and was on his way back to town, David emerges from behind the rock. Jonathan runs out into the field and embraces David in what was probably the saddest parting of any two friends, as they knew that they would likely never see each other again (which they never did). Before finishing this article, I want to touch on something that Saul says in 1 Samuel 20:31, which says, “For as long as the son of Jesse [David] lives on the earth, you shall not be established, nor your kingdom…” Now this is very important in understanding the friendship between David and Jonathan. Jonathan was the heir of Saul, and under normal circumstances, Jonathan would’ve been king after Saul died. This was not a normal circumstance, however, as David had already been anointed king, and therefore, Jonathan would not get his “rightful” place as king. This fact had no effect on their relationship, and Jonathan saw that David was God’s appointed king, and he was happy for David. So this has been part two of the friendship series, and I pray that this has also given you some insight into what a good friend should be like. 

Friendship Part I: Choosing Wise Friends

          Stop! Whatever you are doing right now, DROP IT! Go grab your Bible and open up to the book of Job (Hint: it is located right before Psalms). If you don’t know the story of Job, read Job chapters one and two. If you DO know the story of Job, read Job and two. So to sum it up, Job had a great life! He was the Bill Gates of the Bible times, the richest man around! Then Satan goes to God and says, “Uh, yeah, you think that Job guy really loves you, God? Well, that’s because he’s got it made! Let me take away everything he owns, and I’ll bet you he will curse your name.” So God gives Satan the OK, with the exception that no physical harm is caused to Job.

            So Satan goes and obliterates everything that Job has, and sits back to watch Job curse God. Satan is in for a surprise, for this is what Job says, “The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away; blessed be the name of the LORD.” Satan is like “WHAT?!” So he goes to God and says, “Yeah, so he didn’t curse you, God, but men, you know how they are, they will give up everything they have for their life. Let me get him physically.” Again, God says OK; with the exception that Job’s life is spared. Satan goes and gives Job boils from head to toe and again sits back to watch Job curse God. I don’t think so. Job does not curse God! Now, with that part of the story told, look at Job 2:11-13. This is the introduction to Job’s three friends, Eliphaz, Bildad, and Zophar. This also shows one of the only things that Job’s friends do that’s right. Job 2:13 says, “So they sat down with him on the ground seven days and seven nights, and no one spoke a word to him, for they saw that his grief was very great.” Too often, when someone is grieving, people come and try to comfort them by talking with them, but most often the grieving person would rather just have someone there grieving silently with them.

            Job 3 is where it gets boring, right? No, in fact this is where the true character of Job’s friends shows. Eliphaz speaks in Job 4, 5, 15, and 22. Also, in Job 42:7-9, Eliphaz is rebuked strongly by the LORD and is told to immediately offer a large sacrifice. In Job 4, Eliphaz tries the theory that Job had sinned and that had brought judgment on Job. However, in Job 1:8, Job is described as blameless, upright, and one who shuns evil, so it doesn’t sound like Job had sinned. We’ll come back to Eliphaz, but I want to touch on the other two right now. Bildad speaks in Job 8, 18, and 25, and is mentioned again in Job 42:7-9. Zophar speaks in Job 11 and 20, and like the other two is mentioned again in Job 42:7-9.

            The debate throughout the book of Job is why Job was suffering. Did he sin? Did his children sin? Job’s friends are of little to no help to him during this period in his life. Job is despairing, and his friends are bringing him even more grief. Then, a younger guy named Elihu steps in and says, “Wait! Hold the phone!” He says this, “I know that I am young and you are old, and for this reason, I’ve kept my mouth shut, but no more!” Elihu goes on to rebuke Eliphaz, Bildad, and Zophar and goes on further to snap Job back into reality. Elihu proclaims God’s goodness, justice, and majesty. He is the voice of reason in the matter during this period of time. Elihu is our start to what a friend should look like; he tells Job the truth about God and His goodness. He tells Job that there is really a plan and purpose in all of this.

            Then, in Job 38, BAM! God appears in a whirlwind and asks Mr. Woe-is-me several rhetorical questions such as, “Where were you when I laid the foundations of the earth? Have you comprehended the breadth of the earth? Have you entered the treasuries of snow or have you seen the treasury of hail?” Job’s response is this, “Behold, I am vile; what shall I answer You? I lay my hand over my mouth. Once I have spoken, but I will not answer; yes, twice, but I will proceed no further. God is not done yet though, as He continues with several more rhetorical questions. Job is immensely humbled at these questions, and chapter 42 contains his repentance, and eventually, his restoration both in health and in wealth. Job can be confusing on whose advice is good and whose advice is flawed, but my belief is that Zophar, Eliphaz, and Bildad are all flawed in their thinking and advice, while Elihu gave good advice and tried to set Job straight. 

Friendship: Bind Us Together, Lord

               We are stuck on this earth with over six billion other people, so that implies that you will make friends (and sometimes enemies). Since there are so many people around us, no matter where you live, you like to have friends right? I know I do! The Bible says a lot about friendship, and even more about love, so I think it’s pretty important, don’t you? This is just a short introduction to a five-part series on friendship. We’ll look at just a couple friends that are mentioned in the Bible, and we will also look at what the Bible says about being a good friend. I pray that anyone reading this will hopefully learn something new about choosing friends, being a good friend, and what the Bible says about friends. 

Filming from a Christian Perspective

Of all the things that influence today’s society, the media is the most influential. What goes into your mind is what will come out in your actions and words. One extremely important part of the media is the film industry. It is my belief that it is possible for Christians to take a stand in the film industry and produce movies that are captivating, yet still biblically based. Sherwood Pictures, creators of Fireproof and Courageous, is a great example of how a movie that is made by Christians should look. If you are looking for a career as an actor, director, editor, etc., or even just learning to discern whether a movie is good or not, I hope that what the Bible says and my thoughts from it will be of some help.

            1 Corinthians 10:31 says “Whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.” This needs to be the first verse that you think of when you’re watching, making, or acting in a movie. In fact, I think that we could ask ourselves this question before doing anything, “Am I bringing glory and honor to God by what I’m doing?” Colossians 3:23 says “Whatever you do, work at it with all your strength, as unto the LORD and not to men.” At the end, when we are in heaven, it won’t matter how many movies you made, or even if you made any at all, but what will matter is the content of movies you’ve watched or made, and how you’ve decided to live your life.

            Now don’t mistake what I am about to say, but I think that violence is alright to put in movies or to watch in movies, as long as the film does not dwell on it. In some films, violence and evil are shown as the better path to take, and they seem rewarding, and that is when evil is wrong in a film. Violence is a part of the fallen world, and so I believe that it is alright to have only as much violence as you need to develop a plot, and no more. The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe is a film based on the book by C.S. Lewis, who was a Christian author, and yes, he had violence and evil in his books, and there is violence and evil in the movie. I have no real problem with that, because in that particular movie, the evil is portrayed as definite evil, and violence is portrayed how it should be: a horrific, awful problem that infests our world.

           

           

            A big issue in movies is sexual immorality and immodesty. You might say, “Well, I would NEVER watch a movie that has that in it!” The truth is, that theme is quickly creeping in to most movies that are coming out, and the sin may be subtle in movies now, but if you allow any of it in your movie-watching, it will soon become a large issue. Philippians 4:8 says “Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things.” If we’re meditating (or “thinking about”) violence, cursing, and sexual immorality, then we’re in some big trouble. Instead, Paul says whatever is PURE, whatever is NOBLE, and so on.

            In conclusion, if your film is desired to bring glory to God, you do your best and leave the results up to Him. If you truly sought to bring Him glory, then your production was a complete success. Refrain from dwelling on violence, evil, and sexual immorality. I hope that I’ve gotten close to the point of how Christians can affect the media. Let me end with this: Christians have huge potential to affect the media, and more importantly the film industry, but their main goal has to be to bring glory to God, and leave the results up to him.

~ Whatever you do, do it to the glory of God – 1 Corinthians 10:31

Facebook or Faithbook?

             Most people around the world have a Facebook account, but do they have a Faithbook? The Bible is the Faithbook, and my question is, do we read the Bible more than our News Feed? Facebook is becoming more and more popular in today’s society, and Faithbook is becoming less and less popular. I want to quickly take a step back and look at the influence that Facebook has on us versus the influence that Faithbook has on us. I think that the results will be thought-provoking and helpful. I have a series of questions that I hope will help answer the question of which we are most dependent on, Facebook or Faithbook?

1. How much time do we spend on Facebook? How much time do we spend reading the Faithbook?

           

            I cannot answer this question for you, but for me, I spend under an hour on Facebook every day, which is probably more than I should. I have several different times that I read my Bible throughout the day, but added up; it normally reaches about thirty minutes of Bible reading. Psalm 119:11 says “Thy word have I hidden in my heart, that I might not sin against God.” This should be more important than so-and-so’s dinner or who dating who. If we don’t spend time reading God’s Word, then how can we hide it in our hearts?

2. If your day gets hectic, which do you make time for: Facebook or Faithbook?

            With five other siblings, many days end up being chaotic and not going the way I planned. Now, for me, Bible reading is a part of my school curriculum, so I read my Bible every day as schoolwork. Sometimes, though, our days will get so crazy that Mom will just have to have us stop doing school that day, and on those days is when I have trouble making myself read the Bible. I don’t, however, have trouble checking Facebook on those days. So which do you make time for?

3. What is the part about Facebook that makes you want to come back every day? What part about Faithbook is so hard to do every day?

            I think why I like Facebook so much is that I can talk with friends, see what other people are doing and let others know what I’m doing. My best friend lives in South Africa, so the chat aspect of Facebook has been a blessing for me. I think everybody has their own reasons for not consistently reading their Bible, and that includes me. I am slowly but surely learning to love reading the Bible and that is helping me as a whole. What is so hard about reading the Bible for you?

4. What would your life look like if you limited your time on Facebook and increased your time reading the Faithbook?

            If you have no idea to the answer of this question, try it, and I guarantee that you will see a change, even if it’s only a small change. The Bible says in Hebrews 11:6 that without faith, it is IMPOSSIBLE to please him. If you’re relying on Facebook and communicating with your friends (which is not bad), and if you don’t have total dependence (faith) on God, you cannot please him. I do not think that Facebook is entirely bad, but if you love it more than God, and if you are making it your idol, then it is bad.

~ You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind…” – Matthew 22:36